Living Under Constant Strain: A Mother’s Reality in Israel

25 Feb 2026

Living Under Constant Strain: A Mother’s Reality in Israel

from Alexandra

It’s early in the morning, the sun is rising and my day starts as usual with breakfast for the children.

But the difference to earlier times is that I can’t simply concentrate on the day’s schedule. My head is buzzing with thoughts that won’t let go: What if it happens today? What if war suddenly breaks out, as many fear? Every piece of news from the region, every diplomatic move, every twitch of military tension gives me pause – and makes me sit up and take notice.

As a mother in Israel, I live in a constant state of expectation. We watch the news, but more than that, we listen to every sound, every plane in the sky, every noise in the night. Sometimes it’s a quiet flicker of alert that runs through everyday life, sometimes it’s a loud, urgent thought that wakes me up at night. We live in a country that never really comes to rest.

It’s hard to describe what it means to live under this kind of tension. The constant uncertainty about the future never really lets you go. The pressure that comes with waiting for a possible war is like an invisible weight on your shoulders.

The children often ask if there will be sirens again soon, if they have to go to the shelter. Sometimes I wonder how long I can explain to them that everything is “okay”, that it’s just a “protection mechanism”. Over the last few weeks, I’ve noticed how much the constant vigilance has changed my children too. They are more excited, more nervous – and I often feel helpless as a mother. I can’t promise them that everything will be better tomorrow, and that hurts.

But there are also moments when I try to block out the tension – when we have dinner together, laugh, talk about the day or simply watch a movie. These little moments of “normality” are what keep us together as a family, what give us some peace in the silence of these tense times. And it is precisely these moments that we as parents try to create as often as possible.

How can you make everyday life easier?

There are days when my thoughts go round in circles and the constant worry almost overwhelms me. That’s when I try to take small steps to relieve myself and my family. Psychologists say that it’s at times like these that it’s crucial to create routines, even when life outside the home seems chaotic. A structured daily routine – the plan for the day, set meal times, shared activities – helps us to maintain control over what we can influence.

I’ve learned to consciously allow myself breaks, even if it’s only for a few minutes. A quick chat with a friend, a few deep breaths when the children are at school – all these things help to clear my head. If I notice that I’m thinking too much, I distract myself with something: I go for a walk, watch a movie or read a book. Sometimes it helps to consciously distance yourself from your worries, even if only for a short time.

And then, of course, there are the conversations with my partner. It’s not always easy, but we try to support each other, to remind each other that we are carrying this burden together. Psychologists recommend that couples talk to each other more in stressful times, that they remind each other that they are not alone.

Psychological perspectives: living in constant tension

The psychological strain of such a lifestyle should not be underestimated. Psychologists point out that the permanent state of tension can lead to exhaustion. It is a condition that not only puts a strain on the psyche, but also on the body. Insomnia, irritability, constant nervousness – these are all symptoms of chronic stress that many people experience.

In the long term, this tension can lead to serious mental health problems. An expert in trauma and stress management explains that chronic insecurity can destroy the feeling of control over one’s own life. And without control, the feeling of helplessness grows. This is particularly dangerous because it can lead to people withdrawing inwardly, neglecting their social relationships and falling into a kind of “survival mode”.

However, there are also positive aspects that psychologists emphasize: The ability to live with this uncertainty strengthens our resilience. By learning to survive and adapt in difficult times, we build inner strength. It is important that we keep reminding ourselves of what we can do to stabilize ourselves emotionally. This can be done through simple rituals – be it breathing exercises, exercise or a daily conversation with a trusted person.

Living in constant tension is a challenge. Especially as a mother in Israel, where everyday life is characterized by uncertainty, it is often difficult to stay focused. Worries about the safety of the family, the constant news of military tensions and the uncertainty of what might come weigh heavily on us. But despite the constant stress, there are ways to deal with this situation.

It is the small moments of calm, the structure in everyday life and the exchange with others that help us not to suffocate in the tension. It is the will to persevere and remain strong for the family that drives us forward – even if the future remains uncertain.